I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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