I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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