The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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