You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
