dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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