i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
