so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
