I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
