love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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