he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
