I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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