Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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