Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
