I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
