when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Randomize
