Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
