I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
