He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
