he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Randomize
