we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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