I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
