"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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