the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize