Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Randomize
