i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
