your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
