Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Randomize
