Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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