all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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