so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
