U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize