You work out of a Hotel?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
