Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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