Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize