Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
