He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
