Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
i just google imaged poop.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Randomize
