soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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