i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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