If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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