How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
