After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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