his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
