I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize