like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I'm like, not good at living.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Randomize
