I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
