every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
