but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize