The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Randomize
