Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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