I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
